Unexpected Kiss

It was a rainy and sucky friday evening.. I was waiting for the 706 to get home. I was tired, hungry and cold. While I was waiting two girls walked past me. I didnt pay any attention at them as I was strugling with my biological needs.

Suddenly someone touched my arm and I turned. It one of the girls from before. She was a blonde highschool girl, she had a naughty smile that I didnt forget till this day. As I was trying to remember who she was she simply let it out..

"Can I kiss you?"

I looked as dumb as I could. Completely shocked.. I couldnt give an answer, not because that I was that shocked at this request but it was simply because she didnt let me.. As soon as I heard those words , she landed a passionate kiss. It didnt last for too long but it was definately fun and exciting. After spending half a minute kissing me she leaned back, smiled at me landed another kiss and walked away with her giggling friend... I never saw her again..


These kinds of things dont happen everyday, and it is worth writing..

I admire that girl for her courage..

As for today I still ask myseelf why she kissed me.. Was she drunk? Definately not, the kiss didnt taste after alkohol.Maybe drugs than? But than again I didnt get the impression..

I guess she just wanted to kiss someone.. Good for her and good for me.. I was feeling lonely anyways..

The Valentines Day Loser starts his journey..

Now that I have written a few posts to make a simple introduction of my life im about to start the real blog..

As you see my blogs name is "Romance of the Valentines Day Loser", apparently I am the Valentines Day Loser.. Therefore from today on I will start to share you my experiances with woman.. Some of the stories will be funny while some of them may sound plainly stupid.

Here comes a story of today:


I was sitting in the train listening to a song when a goddess caught my attention. Long, dark , straight hair falling down on her shoulders.. She was clearly european but she had the beautifull eye shape of a southlander. I couldnt stop looking at her.. Her face was perfect, it had the elegance of a lady and the cuteness of a highschool girl.

Whilst I was looking at her like a idiot behind my sunglasses the train arrived to the Mainstation. The last two stations I kept saying these words to my self:

"Come on dude, maybe she is single as well.."
"Dont count on your looks, count on the heath of the moment"
"Go to her, and if you get turned down you have at least had some adrenaline!!!"

My body filled with excitement when I saw her standing up to get out of the train. I jumped out of the train after her. It was only than when I payed attention at her physic.. She was gorgeous..At this point I have to point out that I rarely pay attention to the curves of a woman..

But this woman was simply incredible.. I was impressed to no end and I decided to follow her and intercept her. She walked in to the station and I follow her. It took me 3 times to stop her. At the first two times I raised my hand but lost energy. I simply couldnt touch her shoulder and stop her. But at the third try I managed it..

She turned at me with a little suprised face, than came the following

???= Oh..
Burak= Heya
*the girls smiles and says*= Heya
*I grab offer my hand and we shake hands*
Burak= Im Burak and youuu areee? *I put a nice smile on my face*

The girls puts a cute smile on her face, the kind of smile that says "aaaaah I know what you are up to sweety..".
Christine= Im Christine..
Burak= So umm.. would you like to drink a coffee or something?
Christine= Sorry, I dont have time (here she puts a "awww u poor guy smile")
Burak= Oh so u dont have time for now.. how about later? (here I put the "Never give up!!" face)
Christine= Sorry no time at all (she smiles even more cuter)
Burak= Oh, okay than.. have a good day.. see ya..
Christine= See yaaa..

And so I walk my way and she walks hers.. I knew what was coming so I wasnt surprised and I didnt feel any sadness or rejection. I loved the adrenaline and heat of the moment.. I felt manly, strong and confident. My knees were soft and my body was pumped up with energy. When I entered my train to get home I said to myself..


"That was awesome, I should do it more often.."

Türkiye

I will write this once, and never again..


I am proud of my heritage..

Im proud being Turkish.. Although I sometimes have my disagreements.. I cant stop loving it..

If pride would have been a crime id be sentenced for life..

The Journey to the North

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2PBeKzVhWHY

Maybe I shouldnt have come to Germany..

I feel like everything I have done since 2006 summer, every step that I have taken was a huge mistake.. I remember the words I heard from a person that was once very dear to me

"You will not succeed anything in Germany, you will come back to Turkey, I dont believe that you will achieve anything.."

Maybe she was right..I hate to admit it, it instults my honor...

True, I havent achieved anything. I kept starting over and over again.. Meanwhile I lost precious people and parts of my past. It pains me that I have become so depressed..

I hate it..

But what would have happened had I stayed in Turkey? I wouldnt have grown so much I wouldnt have learned so much.. But was this all really worth the sacrifice? I doubt it..

There was a time when I loved myself, a time when I thought that I was at the top.. I was intoxicated.. Now that I witness that I am no longer at the top and that I am being crushed under the foot of my consciousness I see that my Intoxication has been infected...

I should stop thinking about the past, unfortunately I cant.. I must let go of it.. This makes me sick, I keep talking about myself its always "I, I , I!!!".. Gökhan said "we must let go off our past, time passes by we have grown up, we were foolish at the past.. Foolishness is Happyness". He is right. He couldnt put it in a better way.

I am fully aware of this situation, I should cope with it. My belief is that the first step is to stop hating yourself..

Time to pull the act together and acting like a man.. The time for whining blaming is over.. It is time to stand up and receive or deliver the last punch...

Romance of the Valentines Day Loser

Why Valentines Day Loser?

Well it is obvious isnt it?

Isnt the Romance of the Valentines Day Loser the best?

You are confused... I will explain it to you with an example. Today I was in the cafe with two friends of mine, they both ranted about they boys they like and how they dont pay attention to them. I told both the girls to calm down and told them the truth. I believe it was not convenient for them but than again truth always hurts..

While they were going on with their ranting I looked outside of the window. It was a rainy summer day. It was warm and the water that was gushing down the street was not colder than a shower. I thought about what I would have done If I had a girlfriend...

I would have grabbed her by her hand, dragged her outside kissed her beneath the big oak tree while the rain softly wet our clothes. Than I would go with her home, take a bath ,open a wine bottle and have a most romantic night under candle light...


Now you know , why I call this place "The Romance of the Valentines Day Loser"...

Sei is out!

Wine

Yeah yeah , this is pretty nice.. Starting a blog after drinking almost a bottle of wine. Well I had to start it anyways and I cant think of a better day..

I have been feeling down, I have been feeling weird. I think that is because I stopped smoking. Why did I stop? Because I was smelling bad and I know that woman dont like the taste of tobacco unless they smoke themselves ( even than they dont like it). The idea came when I reached for my parfume, I was about to go to the university and as always I was going to use my perfume. I used it and than grabbed my cigarettes.. Only than did I see how stupid it was to do this..

I knew that once I would be in the university I would smoke one with Dominik or someone else. THAN WHY USE THE FUCKING PERFUME??? Its awesome smell would vanish the second I lit up my cigarette.. So that was the reason why I quit..

Now Im gonna tell you why I smoked a cigarette today. It was because I was fucked up in my mind for 2 weeks. I couldnt focus I couldnt understand, I believe people thought of me as a freak ( I dont give a fuck most of the time). I had to gather my consciousness.. So that was why I filled my lungs with that sweet deadly little piece of shit...


Sei Out...